4.8.11

Day 4; 
A Habit You Wish You didn't Have

I have two.

The first would be not doing what I'm supposed to do.
I have a bad habit that, as you can clearly tell by me just barely doing more of that blog challenge I started like two weeks ago. 
...and I'm only on day 4... and skipped day 2 and 3 (But I have good reasons for that, I promise.) 
I hardly did my homework in school. Honestly, I wonder why I even got the good grades I had in my classes. I almost never did my homework. Except for in MDT and Advanced Tech. 
Sometimes I just forget to do things. Like at work, someone will ask me to do something, and then I get sidetracked and then they ask me again and I say "Oh duhh, I forgot. Durr." Which is a really, really stupid thing to say more than once. a year. 

The second would be pretending not to care about things when I'm afraid it's going to hurt me.
My friend pointed that out to me. He told me that I shut off from the world and act like I don't care about something I really want, because I don't want to lose it. Or I don't want to not get it and be disappointed.
I think it also fits in with me pretending that things that hurt me, don't hurt me, and I just shrug it off. 
I have this sensitive side that only my best, best friends see when it comes to these two subjects. 
Most of the time I do it because I hate, above all other things, when people feel sorry for me. 
I don't want them to waste their time on me because "ooh someone said something about me" or "ooh, I didn't get that thing I was working towards." 
I don't like it when people pity me.
Console me.
Tell me everything's going to be alright.
It just doesn't fly with me...
I wish I didn't shut myself off from the world like that.

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